You must wait for the server to be registered in the list, this way it will appear in the list. if you do not get this ID, I repeat you will not appear in the list. Insusive I have the same problem. He does not register me if I see him. but it does not enter the server either, but it creates a new game.
I have this... http://prntscr.com/iyn5uz
Even on the same server I have an ark without problems open, so it is not a problem of ports, in my case I have everything released as you. I really do not know what the problem is. At the same time the cube world had a similar problem, but then they solved it. in this case I do not know what will be happening.